The War in the ROFL East
The War in the ROFL East is a series that was made by Pieboy6000, inspired by Thunderbirds101's War series. The war takes place in July 2007, in which the United Speakonian Soviet Republic was at war with AfgLOListan, fighting alongside the United Lols of Roflica in a temporary alliance. The first episode was created and released just a day after its announcement. The series was cancelled about a month before the Galactic War was announced, as Pieboy deemed it "rather boring," both "to make and to watch." The series is considered non-canon as the timeframe precedes Earth 2's occupation, and thus contradicts many future events. Caution: The following sections will contain spoilers to the story. Read at your own risk! Episode 1 - In the beginning... The episode begins in an unnamed International Airport in Lolistan. A man (Simply credited as "Airport Dude") is watching over the airport. As he talks to himself, he notices and hears something on the display. Within a few seconds of him watching, the terrorists open fire murder countless civilians. The man, terrified, attempts to call Microsoft Sam. Sadly, he is in the process of taking a massive dump, but Mike picks up the phone. The man informs Mike of the problem, and Mike tells him he will inform Sam. Just after, the lead terrorist bashes the door down and murders the Airport guy. Mike, bewildered, calls for Sam to come in. Sam returns from his dump informing Mike of how nice it was. Mike then tells him about what he was just told. Sam immediatlly blames the USSR, and accidentally calls Tactic Advisor Nikolai, who is luckily in a meeting when his phone goes off. He correctly calls Pieboy next time and the two exchange insults. When they both realise that they have had a problem, they decide to meet in Loldon in Englol. Radar Overseer Scotty, Microsoft Sam and Mike, RO/BA Bob, Tactic Advisor Nikolai and Pieboy all meet up in Loldon. They begin discussing, but as soon as Nikolai speaks Sam accidentally tells Nikolai to shut up because he is a communist, despite Pieboy being one too, and a massive argument engages between everyone but Nikolai and Mike. Mike eventually gets them to shut up. Nikolai and Bob explain the plan. A hole in the AA defence perimeter in the capital of Afglolistan, where Al-Analli is possibly hiding, the other possible place is a safehouse in Lolkraine. Pieboy and Sam discuss what units they will send out into the battle. They discuss this briefly and Mike ends the discussion by telling everyone to return the hotels in Loldon, where they will watch the first recon before all heading in. After this, the credits roll. Length: 6 minutes 13 seconds Episode 2 - Moving in The group returns to the meeting and discuss a few more things before they head out to AfgLOListan, but only after Microsoft Mike informs ULMC member Lt. John Powell about his upcoming mission in Afglolistan (which kind of rips off the Operation Overlord briefing from Medal of Honor: Allied Assault). The group discuss who is attacking where. A few seconds later, AT88TV barges in, a bit late to the meeting. He informs them that he is accompanying them to Kalulz, and that due to a rebellion in Vietlol, EmergencyRanger88 could not appear for the meeting. Mike confirms that the SAS are helping in Afglolistan. Mary radios Mike suddenly, telling him they have 1 hour before they are due to fly to Afglolistan. Nikolai manages to talk to Mary. Once it is all sorted it, Radar Overseer Bob tells them all to meet at the LOL-130 for 1pm, and they all leave. It cuts to 1pm, at the LOL-130. Radar Overseer Igor turns up just in time to get aboard. Nikolai accompanies Mary in the cockpit (much to Sam's annoyance). The scene cuts again to 5 hours later. Nikolai says goodbye to Mary (and says he loves her as he jumps out). The crew jump out, and the episode ends with Mary announcing that Operation: Trebuchet has begun, and the credits roll. Length: 7 minutes 17 seconds Episode 3 - Shock and Awe Episode 3 starts with the group (except Mary) landing from jumping out of the LOL-130. Sam asks if they are all there, and it turns out they are. They quickly devise a plan to head to the Lollogram Tower, as it is suspected Al-Analli may be there. About halfway up the building, the ROFL-Robot (which mysteriously appeared out of nowhere) gets a message from EmergencyRanger88, informing them of his victory over the corrupt leader in Vietlol, and that he has taken it over. However, he will not come to Kalulz as he would rather not risk death after taking over his country. He does however, dispatch many Vietlolese troops to all the areas that are being invaded. These soldier arrive before the next chain of events. When they get to Floor 78, Mike breaches the door, only to find Analli is not there, much to Igor's disappointment, as he would rather not walk back down the stairs just yet, as the elevators were out. Mike suggests that they head to Analli's palace to find him, which seemed to be a pretty obvious choice from the start. As they make their way to the palace, Field Commander Mark McLulzy Snr. informs them that an elite squad of soldiers have been pinned down. The group move to save them and quickly eliminate the attackers, only to find they are too late, the soldiers are dead. As they prepare to move, the ROFL-Robot suddenly announces a warning that a nuclear device has been found in Al-Analli's palace. McLulzy and a PSAS bomb defusal team are at the palace and are working to defuse it, and advises that everyone evacuate the area asap, as Analli is not there (though this isn't mentioned). A Chinook, piloted by Mary picks the group up, and they fly away. The perspective now shifts to Mike's POV (in a strangely similar environment to CoD4), as the chopper flies away with McLulzy announcing a warning. He only gets halfway through because he and the defusal team are vapourized suddenly as the nuke explodes. In horror, Mike can only say "Oh my fucking God" before the shockwave hits the chinook, causing it to spin out. As the alarm sounds and the helicopter spins towards the ground, Lt. Volker flies out, shouting "Oh shit!". The episode ends as the helicopter smashes into a building and explodes, leaving the fate of the characters unknown. After this, the credits roll. Length: 5 minutes 53 seconds Episode 4 - The gun pointed at the head of the Earth A few minutes later, the crew wake up. Everyone is alive except for Igor, who is found dead outside of the helicopter, impaled by a smashed helicopter rotor. The crew realise that due to EMP, no one can pick them up, and they can't call for help. They realise this is the end, and the credits roll. Mike cuts off the credits however, mentioning that he can hear a helicopter. The crew, a tiny bit irradiated board the helicopter, owned by the Vietlolese. As they ask if they can speak to EmergencyRanger, he steps out and asks if he may join them on their way to find Al-Analli, as it turns out he may be operating in Vietlol. The pilot immediately sets off, as Nikolai vomits from slight radiation poisoning. They land close by an ICBM launch site - and nearly get picked off by Snipers. Nikolai and Mike take them out, and give the rest of the crew covering fire as they move in. A little bit later, the crew is at the front gate after having a gun fight. Nikolai and Mike walk out and greet them again. Suddenly, there is a rumble, to which Nikolai asks "What the hell is that?" They all turn around to see an ICBM launching into the air. Sam immediately warns OverLOL back in the ULR, only to be cut off by Pieboy, who shouts that there is another missile launching. AT88 then points out that a third missile just launched. Just as Sam finishes speaking, asking Overlol if he's getting him, Mary informs that a fourth has launched. Sam warns Overlol of the massive danger to the countries. Overlol tells them that satelitte is tracking the missiles. 3 will hit within the hour, but one will hit in 10 minutes. EmergencyRanger88 tells everyone go get in the silo, the nuke about to hit in 10 will hit Lolanoi. Scotty says "It's on now guys" and the episode ends. Length: 5 minutes 57 seconds Episode 5 - Ashes to Ashes, Dust to Dust In the final episode, the crew enter the silo, engage in a small firefight, then enter a corridor. They overhear Overlol discover that the nukes aren't real nuclear weapons, but fakes to try and scare the armies of the nations away, much to Sam's annoyance. Overlol tells the group that he knows the location of Al-Analli. He is hidden in a safehouse in rural Loliev, Lolkraine, protected by rogue Azerbainowi troops. The crew head to the surface and fly to Lolkraine, dropping off nearby the safehouse. The idea of this episode was that the crew would land in Loliev, blow through the small town and find the safehouse where Analli was hiding. The scene in which Sam executes him would play, and then it would cut back to July 2011, just after the assault on Linuxtown in the War in the Republic of My, where he would note that his temporary allies are now his enemies, and head off for what was the second episode of the War in the Republic of My. The episode was cancelled along with the series about a month before the Galactic War was announced. Length: 1 minute 27 seconds (Cancelled) Cast Italics mean the character is deceased. A list of the characters in the series: (Al-Analli and all living characters would have appared in Episode 5) *'Microsoft Sam' (Appeared in Episodes 1 - 4) *'Microsoft Mike' (Appeared in Episodes 1 - 4) *'Microsoft Mary' (Appeared in Episodes 2 - 4) *'Radar Overseer Scotty '(Appeared in Episodes 1 - 4) *'Radar Overseer/Battle Advisor Bob' (Appeared in Episodes 1 - 4) *'Tactic Advisor Nikolai' (Appeared in Episodes 1 - 4) *'Pieboy6000' (Appeared in Episodes 1 - 4) *''Airport Dude (Appeared in Episode 1, killed by the Terrorist leader)'' *'Terrorist leader '(Appeared in Episode 1) *''Lt. John Powell '(Non-speaking role in Episode 2, Killed offscreen by the nuclear explosion in Episode 3) *Radar Overseer Igor' (Appeared in Episodes 2 and 3, died in Episode 4)'' *'EmergencyRanger88' (Mentioned in Episodes 2 and 3, Appeared in Episode 4) *'AT88TV' (Appeared in Episodes 2 - 4) *'''Al-Analli '(Would've appeared and died in Episode 5)'' Category:Series Category:Text to Speech Shows Category:Prequels Category:Non-Canon